Thursday, December 18, 2008

The Past 24 Hours of Leone: A Fancy Pants Play

(I have no idea any more how to put a play together so if I make a mistake I don't care)

Scene 1: 2:20 pm- Elementary school that Leone has been working at for 10 days.

Leone:
Oh my, the teacher I've been replacing is fer sure coming back tomorrow so I won't be here tomorrow. AND I don't work at the coffee shop tomorrow... that means my first day off in a month! Oh the things I will do... phone Sheena, go to Slumdog Millionaire with John, finish xmas shopping, knit, read, go for a walk, get groceries, clean out my walk in closet....

Leone's Immune System: Finally I get a break! I've been working overtime. I'm just going to go on a short vacation. No need to lock the door behind me. I'm sure everything will be fine.

Leone starts to sniff.

Scene 2: 4:00pm- Leone arrives for closing shift at cafe.

Leone: I can't stop sniffling! Ah well, tra la la la la.

Phlegm: Oh.... this looks like a fun place to hang out! Hey Snot!

Snot: Why hello phlegm! How are you? I've been here for a bit- the door was unlocked! Say, is that Cough I see coming this way?

Scene 3: 9:00pm- still at coffee shop

Leone: Here's your coffee *sneeze hack whimper* and your muffin. Have a good *cough* evening!

Leone's Boss: Holy you look like crap.

Cough: I just got a text from Sinus Pain- he's on his way!

Cut to a shot of Maui or something

Leone's immune system is sleeping off a hangover on the beach.

Scene 4: 4:30am- Leone is helping friend who stayed over at her place get ready to go to the airport

Friend: Wha wha wha wha

Leone: Huh?

Snot: Where's Random Crap? I thought she said she would be here?

Sinus Pain: Oh, she's over hanging out in the ears.

Scene 5: 5:45am Leone lying in bed comatose.

Spike: Hey! Watcha doing? Can I drink your water? Can I sit on you and purr in your face? Can I knock the kleenex off the bed? Can I get my claw stuck in your pillow? Augh- my claw is stuck! Freak out freak out freak out! Sorry I scratched you but my claw was stuck. What if I sit on the dresser and yowl at you? Hey! I'm in your dresser! No I don't think I'm too heavy to be in here. Hey my claw is stuck in your blouse! I'll just drag it behind me into the hallway. Can you hear my yowl from out here? Watcha doing?

Scene 6: 11:30am in Safeway

Leone is trying to figure out what drugs to buy.

Leone: Cough wheeeeze hack sniffle sneeze sneeze *blow nose* whimper

Other customers avoid her. Bad Hair makes many cameo apperances during this scene to dance jigs.

Scene 7: 1:15pm

Leone is making split pea soup. Leone's Immune System returns from day trip.

Leone's Immune System: AUGH! What the hell? Where's the door? Who are all you people? Jesus christ just look at the kitchen! What is wrong with you! I'm so overwhelmed! *faint*

Leone: Hack cough *sigh* sneeze snort hac cough whimper

The End (it's not a happy nor a good play- it's just this).

And a random LOLcat to make everything okay.


funny pictures of cats with captions
more animals

5 comments:

yarnpiggy said...

Oh, dear. Feel better soon! :-)

Mrs.Q said...

I think I just "saw" the same play!

What yarnpiggy said...

beentsy said...

Oh sweetie! You keep warm and take care. Hope you feel better soon.

jenn said...

So sorry sweetie! But, damn, that was funny!

knitpixie said...

Yea, you, MrsQ and I all saw the same play. I give it two thumbs way down.